


fall out of love

by Meiqizh



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, M/M, Please Don't Hate Me, i'm sorry for hurting you guys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-07-31
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:47:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25630792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meiqizh/pseuds/Meiqizh
Summary: Their relationship, their first kiss, their first anniversary – everything started here, and it was probably there that everything would fall apart. Oikawa loved Hinata, so does Hinata. But sometimes, even the strongest love can't overcome something like this. How does this love story turned out to be such a tragedy ?
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 5
Kudos: 46





	fall out of love

He looked through the window as he waited for the person sitting in front of him who didn’t say a single word since he arrived, to say something. He never once looked up and confronts the eyes of his lover. Hinata wondered when did their relationship started to break down, when did their love started to fade away. He sighed as he closed his eyes; he wished he didn’t remember all the memories they had together. He was never the one that would be out of words, he would always try to say something so that there was no space for silence between them but as he was sitting in front of Oikawa, he didn’t utter a single word. He was tired. He knew their love was on the line as soon as he noticed his lover started to not hold his hand as he used to, when he started to go out more than he usually does. Hinata knew but he chose to not confront Oikawa about it, hoping it was just him being delusional. But here they were, sitting at their favorite coffee shop in front of where everything started. Their relationship, their first kiss, their first anniversary – everything started here, and it was probably there that everything would fall apart.

He tried hard to control his tears. What’s surprising it’s that he was never a weak person but when he started this relationship with Oikawa, the walls covering his heart broke down slowly.

“ _You don’t need to hide yourself when you’re with me, just cry it out if it hurts_ ” said the man that once loved him.

He thought their bond was strong enough to overcome anything, but it wasn’t.

Who would have thought that after all those years, the one not willing to let go was him? He wasn’t the one that made the first step as he took a long time to really fall in love with Oikawa. It all started back to when they were still in high school, Hinata was the quiet kid, sitting at the back of the classroom and never tried to blend with others. He enjoyed being alone. In contrary of Oikawa, the popular and handsome playboy of the school who was adored by many.

They were so different and yet it didn’t stop him from falling in love with Hinata. He was always attracted by the quiet boy as he would always notice that lonely kid sitting at the back of the classroom, looking through the window as the wind danced with the curtains. He tried to get close to the orange-haired boy by sitting next to him, asking him how he was doing every day. Then he wondered what he loved to do. At first Hinata wasn’t really interested into continuing their conversation any further because he thought that Oikawa would get tired of him in no time, just like the others. He was used to be left alone when he started to open his doors to others; they all left because they said he was boring to stay with.

‘ _Everybody left so why would he stay’_ , that was what Hinata wondered as he kept his doors close for the brown-haired boy.

As time pass by, Oikawa didn’t give up and continued to get close to Hinata and his efforts paid off. The lonely boy wasn’t a quiet bird anymore. Hinata started to get used to Oikawa’s presence as he would find it weird if the playboy didn’t ask him how he was doing every day.

 _‘I finally made a friend’_ thought the orange-haired boy as he started to talk more and smile unconsciously.

“ _I love it when you smile_ ” Oikawa said out of nowhere, making his new friend blush. He just loved the way he smiled, because he looked like a child; pure and innocent. At that moment, Oikawa felt something blooming inside of him and he was confused because he never felt this way. He felt the urge of wanting to hold Hinata’s hand growing bigger as days passed by, he wanted to hug him and kiss him – that was not how a simple friend should feel. That was when he realized he wanted to be more than a friend with Hinata, he wanted to do things that friends don’t usually do. That was when _he fell in love_.

He didn’t waste a single second to tell Hinata his feelings, he was ready to put everything on the table and lose it all. He didn’t care about what others would think, nothing matters if he could love Hinata. The day he confessed in front of that coffee shop, he left the orange-haired boy dumbfounded; it was the first time that someone did actually confessed to him and he wasn’t ready at all, especially when that confession comes from a friend he cared dearly. He didn’t give an answer right away, because he was confused about how he really felt toward Oikawa.

 _Was it love?_ He wondered.

It took him so much time to figure out that deep inside he loved his “friend” in a romantic way. It took him at least 6 months to give himself to Oikawa, and during those 6 months, the popular playboy didn’t give up once. He was certain that Hinata was worth waiting for so no matter how long he had to wait, he would wait. On January 10th, Hinata gave his answer at the same place where Oikawa confessed, under the same cherry blossom tree.

Oikawa couldn’t hide his happiness as he hugged and kissed his new lover immediately. He waited for so long and that day finally came, he promised that he would cherish his lover forever.

But promises are meant to be broken.

The ‘ _forever’_ he promised only lasted 5 years.

5 years of happiness, of tears, of precious memories, of unforgettable moments – just ended like that. Oikawa himself didn’t know how it would turn out like this. This wasn’t the end he expected when they first started their relationship.

_Does he still love Hinata?_

Yes, he’s still in love with him but he made too many mistakes that he couldn’t erase. He had hurt Hinata too many times that he couldn’t even count on his ten fingers. He thought that his lover didn’t deserve that, he didn’t deserve all the painful memories he had left on their way to love.

Hinata could have forgiven Oikawa if the latter begged for it but even if he did, the brown-haired man couldn’t forgive himself. If he didn’t drink so much that night when he was out with some friends, he would have never end up with a girl he just met two hours earlier, in a hotel room. If he listened to Hinata that night, to not go home late and to not drink too much, he wouldn’t have end up with a child to care about on his shoulders. Yes, that girl he woke up with at the hotel room was pregnant with a child that was born from a single _mistake_. He could not ask the girl to abort it; he wasn’t cruel enough to ask such an inhuman thing. He had to take his responsibilities because it was his doing and he couldn’t ask Hinata to stay even if he didn’t want to let him go.

As Oikawa sighed and lifted his head, he noticed that Hinata was pale and on the verge of crying. It broke his heart to see his lover suffer; it broke his heart even more to know that he was the reason of his pain. The orange-haired man turned his head to face Oikawa and no matter how hard he tried; he couldn’t smile anymore. _He was tired_.

“Do you remember this place Tooru?” he asked the man in front of him and received a nod to his question.

“This place was like our second home” as he smiled sadly.

Oikawa grabbed Hinata’s hand and held it tightly.

“Sho-“

“I know what you are going to say.” Hinata said, interrupting his lover in his words.

Oikawa was surprised, _‘does he already know ?’_ as he asked himself.

“Do you love her?” he asked, with the little bit of hope he had left.

“No –“

“Then why?” He didn’t understand why everything was falling apart if IOikawa didn’t love that girl that he was meeting almost every week-end. One day when Hinata was heading back home, he saw Oikawa walking out of a coffee shop with a girl next to him. At that moment, he realized the reason why Oikawa was changing: it was because he met somebody new.

The brown-haired man sighed as he looked down, now facing the table. _Should I tell him?_ He wondered.

“Answer me.” when Hinata said those words, his voice cracked a little.

As he was holding Hinata’s hand more tightly, Oikawa tried hard to not break down.

“She’s pregnant with my child.” He said as he lifted up his face that was turning red. _What was it ? Shame ? Guilt ?_

And at that moment, every hope that was left in Hinata just vanished. Before he could notice it, a few drops of tears were already scrolling down his face. Oikawa knew at that moment that he broke the person in front of him entirely; his frail heart was already on the ground, _shattered into pieces_.

How much he wished he could kill himself right now, he wished that everything was just a nightmare and that he would wake up soon. Unfortunately it wasn’t. Few seconds passed after he said those words, Hinata didn’t say a single word as he was trying to free his hand from Oikawa’s grasp but the other one didn’t want to let him go.

“Baby, I’m really sorry … I drank too much that night and-“

As Oikawa was trying to explain, Hinata didn’t say a single word as he was still struggling to free his hand.

“Please look at me …” Oikawa begged, over and over. He knew he didn’t have the right anymore to expect Hinata’s forgiveness. He knew better than anyone that he ain’t worth it anymore.

A few minutes passed as Hinata didn’t utter a single word, covering his face with both of his hands, trying to figure out what just happened to him. He thought he could forgive Oikawa if he just cheated on him, if he still loved him; he could have tried to forgive him. But he could not anymore. Not when there was a child in all of this mess.

He didn’t how he exactly felt at the moment; was he angry? Sad? Pain? He didn’t know. He couldn’t feel anything, he just felt **_empty_**.

Oikawa didn’t push Hinata any further; what did he expect anyway? He knew that everything was screwed up the second that girl called him and told him that he was going to be the father of the child that was born from a single one night stand. When the girl knew that Oikawa already had someone in his life, she tried to walk away, saying that she couldn’t come between them and ruin someone’s life like this.

During that silence, Oikawa told Hinata about how she wanted to abort the child because she couldn’t afford to raise the baby up by herself, but he stopped her from doing it. That child didn’t deserve to pay for his parents’ mistake.

Hinata sighed and lifted up his head, facing Oikawa with his empty eyes. He forced a smile and asked one last question.

“Do you want to give up on us?”

Oikawa didn’t answer. He wanted to stand up and shout no; that he still loved him like the first day. But he didn’t do it. He looked at Hinata with a pained expression; he wanted to apologize for hurting him, apologize for not wanting to give up on them but he didn’t have any other choices. He wished he could go back in time and restrain himself from doing that stupid mistake. But everything was too late already.

“Thank you for loving me, thank you for being my happiness for those 5 years.” Hinata said as he smiled while letting his tears scrolling down his face. Those words stabbed Oikawa like a knife. He didn’t deserve those words.

“Remember to take care of yourself, don’t drink too much. Eat well and don’t work too much. Treat them well and I’m giving you this back.” He said as he took off the ring Oikawa bought for their first anniversary. He never thought this moment would come, this moment when he would take that ring off and leave a part of himself behind. But he didn’t have a choice; he had to do it for the sake of that innocent child. That child needed a family, Hinata couldn’t bring himself to ruin the happiness of that still unborn child.

“Shouyou-“

“Don’t apologize, it’s okay. Maybe it’s hard for you to say it so I’ll say it.”

He stood up from his chair, looking for the very last time at the love of his youth. His first love.

“ **I give up on us**.”

Oikawa stood up and grabbed Hinata’s hand before he could walk past him, during all this time he convinced himself that it was the best solution to let him go but he couldn’t find the gut to let go of his hand. Hinata grabbed the hand that was restraining him from walking past through that door. He muttered these words before taking off Oikawa’s hand of him as he walked out of the coffee shop.

“ ** _I love you_** _.”_

And that’s how they **_fell out of love_**.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for much for reading "fall out of love" !! i hope i didn't cause too much pain to you, i know it's hard to read angst oihina..  
> feel free to leave me comments! thank you again for reading!!


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